Silence is GOLDEN!

NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

Alright so I am up in the wee hours of the morning.  This has been a hectic weekend. What woke me up?? Well when the baby monitor get's unplugged in the girls' room, it beeps in mine. So at 4am, mine started beeping, which alerted me and scared me all at the same time. Now, living out in the country, i know that in order for some creep to sneak into my home, you have to get past 3 dogs, and quietly breake into fort knox!    So. its impossible that someone OTHER than my own children are in their rooms, but it still just jolted me up. AND of course now that i'm up, my mind starts it's engine's at 90/nothing.  

Yesterday was "clean out papa's house" day.  It's been 3 weeks since he's passed. He is missed terribly by myself, alex and the kids.   We were told by the "authorities" in this situation that only the BLOOD grandkids were allowed to come out and pick...  So, out of 4 grandkids all the wives and hubbies were to stay home with all the little chitlin's..... So, I did.  Come to find out. Im the ONLY one that did. Which is kind of hurtful. Maybe Im just looking to much into this, but it kind of makes me feel like Im not REALLY family. BUT again, I look deep into things sometimes when I dont really need to.

So, I get over there, to pick up Alex's stuff that he has picked out and my children and I are allowed to go through what is left over. Which is def. okay with me. Because apparently noone likes GOOD STUFF!!!! lol....... 

Now comes the tricky part... I guess we are in fact moving. Yay for us... MAYBE..... I have FINALLY gotten my home to look the way I want it, everything is organized, everything is where I want it. lol and it has taken me 2 years to do it... yes, 2 stinkin' years to perfect this mess..  Now, we are going to be moving into a home that is like half the size of this. and needs alot of work. HOWEVER, it's going to be paid for. No payments! WOOOHOOO!! We can finally play catch up!  But here's the catch. I love this place... I am on 14 acres. Noone bothers me, my kids can go outside and play and not worry about neighbors, but we have neighbors if we ever need anything. Everyone on my street are family, obviously except for us. lol.........   I live at the END of the road. there is no more road to go. I love this. I really do.     The home where we would be going is inthe middle of two other houses.   Superman's mom and dads, and then on the other side, who knows...   BUT again........ paid for!
Here's what makes me sad. I hate moving! no i don't! I love moving, because you basically clean house. LOL  It's a super way to get organized...  hehehe super!  I just hate the stress of it. I will have to start driving my children to and from school everyday, because this is not in the small town that I live in, it is in the BIG town that I hate! but it's still in the "country" of the big town. I love this small town.  Do I really want to move?? ehh no not really. But again, paid for!   and while talking to "the man" i asked him if he was going to flip out if I started moving stuff around, because some of the furniture is being left for us. Well, he was like "why would you move it?!?" ummm maybe because if it's my home now, I want to decorate my own home......... duh!

Another thing, is that I want my mom here so badly. My mom lives in Tx. That's where I am from. I love and miss it dearly. But I love and miss my mom dearly! I want her to be here in Fl. because I can't move out of the state. It's been hell just trying to get her to THINK about moving.  BUT I could put her in this house that we (should) be moving to, then she wont have any payments, her and her little dog, would be great. AND holidays would be so much less depressing for me.  Yeah, i think that is why I hate holidays so much. No family to spend it with. Obviously other than my own little nestlings.  I almost feel like if my family and I move into this housewe've been given that any chances I had of getting my mom to move to FL. are shot!!!!


Seriously, it's too quiet here at now 5am. At least with the ruckus of the kiddos, I dont have time to think.... lol or at least i can't hear myself think over the screams of the littlest one's. lol ....  Whatever is going to happen, i guess God will take care of us.


5 am........... This sucks, I can't even go and make coffee because its too loud... lol and at least 2 of the 4 kids would come walking out.   Although, I can hear Boogie Bear snoring and he snores just like his dad.... haha that is funny! Unless he's in my bed, then it's irritating!